I just read this from Samuel Rutherford:
“Believe me, I am most gladly content that Christ breaketh all my idols in pieces. It hath put a new edge upon my blunted love to Christ; I see that He is jealous of my love, and will have all to Himself. . . Christ’s love hath pained me: for howbeit His presence hath shamed me, and drowned me in debt, yet He often goeth away when my love to Him is burning. He seemeth to look like a proud wooer, who will not look upon a poor match that is dying of love. I will not say He is lordly. But I know He is wise in hiding Himself from a child and a fool, who maketh an idol and a god of one of Christ’s kisses, which is idolatry. I fear that I adore His comforts more than Himself, and that I love the apples of life better than the tree of life.” (p. 225)
After leaving my eldest daughter at college for the first time I retained my composure very well, for me anyhow, until reminded of the good-night kisses that would no longer be mine. This thought was a heavy one, and laid my spirit low. Today, God providentially led me to read this portion of Rutherford’s writings. I am thankful for a daughter that is loving and obedient, but she is but one of “Christ’s kisses,” an “apple of life.” Rutherford’s letter rightly assess my situation–“a child and a fool.” God used it to open my eyes to my sin and bring necessary chastening. I pray that I might honor Him and refocus my heart upon the Giver of every good gift–the Father of lights (James 1:26-18).